American oddity
12 Feb 2007 01:25 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
I wanted to mention this on my holiday blog but forgot and just got reminded of it when I saw this comic.
Quite a few of the Americans on the ship would use "Excuse me!" to apologise instead of "I'm sorry", which I found very strange. I use "excuse me" to either get someone's attention or if I want to get past etc. not for apologising. Despite having been to America and with Americans, thas was the first time I encountered this.
To be honest, if someone stepped on my foot and said "Excuse me", I would say "No, I won't. You better watch it." If they said "I'm sorry", I'd say "Don't worry about it."
Is this usage of "excuse me" common or maybe a regional habit?
Quite a few of the Americans on the ship would use "Excuse me!" to apologise instead of "I'm sorry", which I found very strange. I use "excuse me" to either get someone's attention or if I want to get past etc. not for apologising. Despite having been to America and with Americans, thas was the first time I encountered this.
To be honest, if someone stepped on my foot and said "Excuse me", I would say "No, I won't. You better watch it." If they said "I'm sorry", I'd say "Don't worry about it."
Is this usage of "excuse me" common or maybe a regional habit?
no subject
Date: 12/2/07 01:35 pm (UTC)Quite common in the UK as well.
But these things are open to interpretation... such as your reply of "You better watch it." can be seen as threatening violence.
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Date: 12/2/07 01:42 pm (UTC)I probably wouldn't actually say "better watch it" but I definitely wouldn't react the same way I'd react to "I'm sorry."
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Date: 12/2/07 01:46 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 12/2/07 01:47 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 12/2/07 01:43 pm (UTC)"I'm sorry."
"Excuse me."
"Pardon me."
"I beg your pardon"
"My bad." (This is a recent addition I don't care for, but it's gaining currency.)
The Oxford English Dictionary says, "excuse • verb /ikskyooz/
— PHRASES excuse me 1 a polite apology. "
no subject
Date: 12/2/07 02:14 pm (UTC)ORIGIN Latin excusare ‘to free from blame’.
So linguistically the difference is the following:
If I say "I'm sorry" (ORIGIN Old English, pained, distressed) I acknowledge if I've done something wrong and if I say "Excuse me" it was the other person's fault?
This usage is simply wrong in my eyes.
Now, where's
no subject
Date: 12/2/07 02:46 pm (UTC)So, although I don't think I'd generally say "Excuse me" rather than "Sorry" if I bumped into someone, it wouldn't seem especially strange if someone else said it - it's hardly a huge leap of meaning!
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Date: 12/2/07 02:09 pm (UTC)http://www.askoxford.com/concise_oed/excuse?view=uk
I agree with those who say that reacting to it differently from "I'm sorry" isn't appropriate.
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Date: 12/2/07 02:16 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 12/2/07 02:28 pm (UTC)Anyway, what I was commenting on was this "your reply of "You better watch it." can be seen as threatening violence" I thought that threatening violence against some one who was making a polite remark was a bit much.
The Oxford English Dictionary people know more than I can ever hope to about English, so if they're saying it's polite and if in my experience it's polite, I'm not going to take offense if some one says it.
I'll do my best not to say it to you (the above tongue-in-cheek example notwithstanding) but if I make a mistake and do, please don't be offended. I don't mean it to be offensive.
I just looked in my e-mails to see your comment to the post I deleted, but I candn't find it. I wanted to post it here. I just see the two comments that still show. EEP! I really am sorry. I'm making a muck of things here.
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Date: 12/2/07 02:39 pm (UTC)Oh, I know perfectly well they meant it as an apology but to me (and others, including English native speakers), it sounds off.
I think when you reply to a deleted comment you won't get the notification as the reference is missing. I probably hit Send just before you deleted it because otherwise I would have received the "can't reply to non-existing comment" error.
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Date: 12/2/07 03:44 pm (UTC)"Excuse me" before an event is a request.
"Excuse me" after an event seems confrontational.
Eg. Trying to squeeze past someone you might say "excuse me."
If you bumped into someone in the act of squeezing past, and said "excuse me" it's almost accusatory.
Perhaps this is because "excuse me" after an event can be used in a mocking or sneering way in England... eg.
You've just had a go at someone for being rude or something.. they reply.
"Well excuse me for breathing!"
After an event excuse me's are often used to placate in a mocking way, to feign being sorry while subtly hinting that you're not sorry at all. A swooping tone of voice and inflection is also present.
Thus I'd say that while it may be common parlance in the US, using "excuse me" instead of "sorry" in England can be fraught. It has undertones of irony and sarcasm.
"Excuse me" before an event/before you're done something doesn't have this undercurrent.
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Date: 12/2/07 03:58 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 12/2/07 04:36 pm (UTC)I think that if some one trods on your foot and says "excuse me!" and he or she looks or sounds apologetic, I would assume the speaker isn't trying to be rude and should be given the benefit of the doubt. Responding snarkily doesn't really make anything better, does it?
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Date: 13/2/07 01:33 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 12/2/07 01:43 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 12/2/07 01:46 pm (UTC)Another thing that grates on me is the way (young) Aussies inflect their speech. As if everything was a question? Even though it's a statement? I start to find it really annoying? After a while? I know they don't mean to offend? But even so? It's a bit confusing? And misleading? Like you're being interrogated? You find it keeps catching you out?
"It's a nice day?"
"I dunno, is it???"
"I only said, it's a nice day?"
"I dunno, is it a nice day???"
Etc.
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Date: 12/2/07 01:50 pm (UTC)I don't know enough Aussies to verify that but I've heard many Americans inflect their sentences like that and it's coming over here, too. Just like, like, the horrible usage of "like". :o/
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Date: 12/2/07 02:14 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 12/2/07 03:01 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 12/2/07 01:46 pm (UTC)Its not regional...
Date: 12/2/07 01:58 pm (UTC)Re: Its not regional...
Date: 12/2/07 04:18 pm (UTC)Re: Its not regional...
Date: 12/2/07 04:19 pm (UTC)Re: Its not regional...
Date: 12/2/07 04:21 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 12/2/07 04:21 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 12/2/07 04:31 pm (UTC)Think of it as asking to be excused for such behavior, rather than the other.
It's sort of a "sorry" in America, yes. Usually I say I'm sorry, but I've used the "excuse me" before.
no subject
Date: 12/2/07 09:27 pm (UTC)Surely if someone says "Oh 'excuse me!" and looking at you apologetically it would imply the same as "I'm sorry"? I've been one for saying "sorry" myself as opposed to "excuse me" but both are decent for apologising for clumsy behaviour. After all we all make mistakes and someone may just be in a world of their own with whatever badness is happening, and would not mean at all to offend you by brushing into you. ;D
Cultural differences?
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Date: 12/2/07 09:33 pm (UTC)Generally, the tone makes clear how it's intended and I didn't mind much as I knew how they meant it (I was just confused) but there was one occasion of a lady barging into me and saying "excuse me" in a hardly apologetic tone that implied she would shoulder me again if I didn't step aside. *That* I found unacceptable.
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Date: 12/2/07 09:52 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 13/2/07 12:32 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 13/2/07 12:38 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 13/2/07 01:05 am (UTC)Thanks!
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Date: 13/2/07 12:40 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 13/2/07 01:36 pm (UTC)